Intergenerational friendships: Why they’re more important than ever

Read time: 3 minutes

For decades, dynamic friendships have always captured the hearts and minds of movie-goers.

Marty McFly and Doc Brown sped 88 m.p.h. in the DeLorean in “Back to the Future.” Carl and Russell spanned the skies in “Up.” And Mr. Miyagi most famously taught Daniel the unstoppable crane kick.

But what makes these relationships so memorable? It’s not just their shared adventures or laugh-out-loud interactions. It’s that their differences help forge a strong bond across the generations. The common term is “intergenerational friendship.”

What is an intergenerational friendship?

The easy definition is when two people with an age difference of 15 years or more become friends. These friendships often start through shared hobbies, volunteer work or family connections. They most naturally form in places like work, places of worship and community groups.

A major life transition, like retirement, can make it harder to form these friendships.

Why these friendships matter more than ever

What’s the main sell of these friendships? The most obvious — it’s nice to have a friend! Also, having a friend from a different generation can bring an unknown flavor to your life.

What music did they grow up with? How do they prefer spending time together? What are their views on obstacles in your life? Their answers to these questions will likely be wildly different than yours. And that new perspective helps both of you build out a deeper understanding of the world.

And in those differences, people can build out their own harmonious melody.

What both sides get from these friendships

Author Lois Wyse had a wonderful perspective on friendships, but especially intergenerational ones. She said, “A good friend is a connection to life — a tie to the past, a road to the future … “

This connection becomes even more powerful when it spans generations. And, in turn, the benefits flow both ways and strengthen over time.

Here are just a few of the great things that can come from an intergenerational friendship:

Companionship

Deep, meaningful connection that transcends age barriers and provides consistent emotional support.

Emotional support

A safe space to share struggles, celebrate victories and receive understanding. All without judgment or competition.

Mutual learning and growth

Both friends discover new things about the world and themselves. Simply by having a new lens to see things.

Shared skills

It’s kind of true: younger friends often teach technology and contemporary skills. And, to the younger’s delight, the older friend shares practical life skills, crafts or professional expertise. (Like waxing a car or painting a fence!)

Combats the health risks of loneliness

Research shows that these relationships can help combat health risks associated with isolation. Things like depression, anxiety, cardiovascular disease and cognitive decline.

These bonds across age groups show that respect, openness and genuine care can bridge any gap. With that in mind, let’s end with a toast for friendships:

There are good ships and wood ships, ships that sail the sea, but the best ships are friendships, may they always be.